(no subject)

[shangba]

( Midday, past lunch observed with Xichen: )


How fared the children this morning?

Comments

[emperorssmile]

I know. It’s getting easier for me to believe it as I get stronger.

A little competition can push us both to be better.

[shangba]

At times, you speak as if I only love the man I lost.

[emperorssmile]

I compare myself to me too much, I think. I know you love me as I am.

[shangba]

But you do not trust.

[emperorssmile]

I didn’t think of it as a trust issue… my own hangups shouldn’t affect how much I trust you.

[shangba]

One day, Wei Ying will learn to love himself as much as he loves our children.

[emperorssmile]

I do. Sometimes.

Other times, I remember some of the things I’ve done.

[shangba]

Perhaps this is a matter to discuss with the immortal hermit.

How to reconcile with a life long lived.

[emperorssmile]

It couldn't hurt.

Sometimes I wonder if I deserve to be happy.

[shangba]

You must be happy now, for all those who would wish you so.

[emperorssmile]

You’re right. You and the kids make me happy.

The life we have together makes me happy, too.

[shangba]

...too quiet?

[emperorssmile]

Sometimes. Loving you makes up for it!

[shangba]

Have said before: I need not be the whole of Wei Ying's life.

[emperorssmile]

I know, but that doesn’t change that I’d rather live a quiet life with you than an exciting life on my own.

[shangba]

Shall reintroduce excitement in Wei Ying's day.

[emperorssmile]

You keep my evenings exciting already.

I wouldn’t say no to adventuring during the day. I’ll strap Liang to my chest and hike around the places adjacent to Cloud Recesses that I haven’t seen yet.

[shangba]

We have a carer now to assist Wei Ying.

[emperorssmile]

I won’t do anything too dangerous with him. I don’t mind bringing him with me sometimes.

[shangba]

He does not limit you?

[emperorssmile]

Sometimes I had to skip playing around because of him, but that’s why we hired the nursemaid for him, isn’t it? I still want to spend time with him, but I like the freedom to choose what I do, too.

[shangba]

As long as you do not feel constricted.

[emperorssmile]

I don’t! Not anymore.

To be honest, I miss the little one when I’m out without him. But I didn’t like feeling like I had to be with him all the time.

[shangba]

You require time to breathe without him. Or me.

[emperorssmile]

Maybe so. Do you need time away from me? I know I can get on your nerves when you need peace.