wuding | (no subject)

Where else would a father and child have been sat? My husband? In a stable?

That’s… Lan Zhan, that’s not what I meant. He gave me a room that’s for my use anytime, any day. No one else will use it even when I’m in Gusu.

To make up his sins.

My old room doesn’t exist anymore, but this one’s not bad. The bed’s pretty big bed. There’s a smaller room attached to it for Lan Liang.

You mean to say he went through trouble.

That’s the thing. It’s the first time he’s done that since I came back. At least without me asking about it.

And you want to believe he chases brotherhood.

I want to, but I’m not naive enough to think that it’s true.

It’s better than before but not good enough on its own.

...I apologise.

What for?

Only time will tell if things between us are on the mend.

For granting him no good faith.

It’s hard to know what he’s thinking these days.

I’m going to check with the nursemaid to make sure she doesn’t mind keeping Lan Liang tonight. I want to see him before my nap, too.

I have but two shichen of travel. Shall arrive before midnight.

You are certain you may bide alone until then?

I might spend the whole time asleep.

You’re sure you’ll be awake enough to bathe with me when you come in?

Forgive me. I could not bear the road dust.

Nothing to forgive. I’ll wait until you come in to bathe, then.

Talking with you has made me feel loads better.

...Wei Ying. 'Every day' need not be today.

I know. I miss you and want to see you as soon as you come in.

We don’t have to sleep together if we’re too tired, but I want to hold you for a little while.

Very well, my love.

( And he is slow to answer after, slave to the haste that always serves to deliver him to Wei Ying hale and whole and ready to withstand whatever demons trouble his husband. The shadow of Jiang Cheng on this night, for all the man lives and breathes unworthily mere quarters away.

Wei Ying spoke truth: for the first time in Lan Wangji's recollection, he is direction to family rooms, rather than a serviceable accommodation in the hosting compound. He is served a lighter meal, attended with lesser flourish, for all he is both Hanguang-Jun and the acting sect leader of Gusu Lan. And it isn't a lack of respect or hospitality, he comes to understand, but the simple intimacy afforded to... family. Ah, what a strange exchange.

After a brief visit to hold Sizhui close, he enters Wei Ying's rooms with care not to disrupt either his exhausted child — briefly attended, looking fatigued but pleasantly pink-cheeked for his travels — or his lover. In the end, the bed creaking tenderly beneath him, he settles at Wei Ying's side, wary to touch and spook him awake with midnight. )

Wei Ying.

[It’s nearly a half a shi before he finds himself back in his room. He takes his outer layers off and leaves them in a small pile near the foot of the bed. They’ll need to be washed come morning after a night hunt, so he doesn’t see the point in folding them. He lies down on top of the covers, partially because he doesn’t want to dirty the sheets and partly because he’s feeling too lazy to get in the bed properly.

It doesn’t take long for him to fall asleep. While he does dream, it’s not the sort of dream that would wake him shaken. By the time he starts to wake, he’s already forgotten what it had been about.

He blinks slowly, then takes the time to stretch his legs and back with a pleased grunt before licking his lips and speaking.]

Lan Zhan.

[He smiles, taking in his lover’s appearance. It’s only been a few days and they’ve been in contact throughout their travels, but he still missed his husband like an amputee misses a limb.]

I had a bath drawn for us. Should still be hot.

[He pushes himself up to a half-seated position and tilts his face towards Lan Zhan’s.]

Aren’t you going to kiss your husband?

( A bath and his husband, all the comforts of a beautiful world displayed tranquil before him. Wei Ying is as if a flower coming to bloom under the sun, helplessly responsive. Lan Wangji answers him in kind, leaning in to bring their mouths together, hands cupping his cheeks.

They are stronger together, brittle apart. To think that Wei Ying bore through the day's hardships alone, his skin sizzling with the residue of malevolent energies — He shudders, draws back, catches his fingers in Wei Ying's hair to stroke the tresses. And his mouth gives chase after, tender. )

You have done so well, standing strong today. ( And his heart breaks, his voice quivers. ) You need be no longer tonight.

[Their kiss is relatively chaste, but he doesn’t mind. He feels the peace of Lan Zhan’s presence and stability that he had been craving since earlier. He even smiles, a weaker thing than when he’s in playful mood, but still genuine. He closes his eyes and lets Lan Zhan give him affection. His fingers pinch at silk and tugs Lan Zhan closer still.]

I know, Lan Zhan. I can be myself with you, no matter what.

[He opens his eyes again and touches Lan Zhan’s cheek. His husband looks worn from travel, but no less handsome for it. His fingers trace Lan Zhan’s cheek, pushing his hair behind his ear.]

It wasn’t good. There had to have been more than a hundred victims. Not all of them came back, and most of the ones that did weren’t strong. There were only a few that were somewhat challenging.

[His eyes drop when he speaks, feeling somewhat ashamed despite not being the one at fault.]

( At times, this is all that Wei Ying needs: a listening ear, someone to absorb the brunt of his violent chatter. A willing, considering partner who does not rush to dismiss him.

And Lan Wangji offers him that, merely straightening his back as he resumes sitting on the bed's border, hands pressed docilely on his knees — at first. Later, inevitably, the mellow bend of Wei Ying's back invites consideration, and he finds himself reaching out to stroke it, to sweetly whisk away his husband's hair that's run riotous on his forehead. To return him to a formality Wei Ying never appreciates and seldom understands. )

Did you... speak to them? ( Were their hurts, their private wants shared? Did Wei Ying have to soothe one and all? ) You calmed their ailings?

( A torturous task for even the most committed practitioner. Wei Ying is no such saintly being, whatever his whims. )

[He moves incrementally closer to Lan Zhan, inviting whatever touch his husband chooses to share. His own hands idly play with the hem of one of his husband’s sleeves, nodding his agreement.]

For most of them. The ones that were more coherent were easier to persuade and pacify. There was a group of kids younger than Sizhui among them. There were elderly there, too. Most of them were satisfied with my to promise to tell their families what happened to them.

[He moves closer still, until they’re close enough to touch. He doesn’t want to think too deeply about it, but he wants to get it off his chest at the same time.]

I only had to exterminate five—no, six of them, that were too far gone.

( Ah, but his beautiful love has all but slipped on his legs, and Lan Wangji nudges and nurses his affection toward him, pulls and tugs to drag his husband properly in his lap. No harm can come to Wei Ying when he is sat so, obediently heeding.

Around him, Lan Wangji's arms sit to nestle him, to keep him safe. From ghosts, from dreams, from nightmares. From the man who rules these realms and sleeps perhaps too well for all that he's done to kids younger than Sizhui. )

Better exterminated than suffering with the malady of a corrupted soul. You know so.

( There is ache that only a soul tattered and fissured may feel, hurt unending. Lan Wangji's mouth chases his husband's temple to allay him. )

You delivered them unto peace.